Every summer, it happens: You blink on the solstice, and when you open your eyes, it’s Labor Day. Summer may not be officially over—we’ve got until the equinox, Sept. 23, for that—but school’s back in session, August has ended and everywhere in the neighborhood, guilty thoughts are arising that we really should have dry-cleaned our winter coats by now.
This all may have you thinking about the inexorable passage of time, gray hairs at your temples and long-lost chances at love. That’s pretty heavy, my dudes, so maybe you should have some fun to distract yourselves. Luckily, the madcap rush of amazing events never stops in Logan Square, so check out our September picks for the funnest, distractingest, hold-on-to-the-summerest events in the neighborhood (and nearby hoods).
Sunday, Sept. 1: Block Party: Swap Meet @ Longman & Eagle, 1 p.m.– 9 p.m.
Longman & Eagle’s (2657 N. Kedzie Ave.) end-of-summer block party comes roaring back, after a two-year absence—this time with a mechanical bull for you to drunkenly fall off of! The country, county-fair theme extends to the fare of corndogs, corn off the cob and loaded nachos—all with an appropriately Longmanny, hipster angle: they’re all meatless. Miko’s Italian Ice will cool you off, and Revolution Brewing will fill up your pint glass. Expect plenty of drinks and DJs too, along with local artist and shop sales.
Thursday, Sept. 5: Packers vs. Bears @ Reed’s Local, 6:30 p.m.
As a sign of the return of autumn, the crisp air and falling leaves have two main competitors: the pumpkin spicening of your local Starbucks and the sound of football whoops from your corner bar. Take part in the latter in Reed’s marvelously local-bar setting, as they air our local ursine footballers’ opener against the hated cheesists from the north. As Reed’s says, they’re no bandwagon fans: They’ll show every game—with sound! At this special event, you can also chow down on free food and groove to DJs during game breaks. Hut!
Friday, Sept. 6: Ope! Baby Midwest Burlesque @ Hairpin Arts Center, 7:30 p.m.
Midwesterners generally have a good sense of humor about the cliches we all can’t help but live up to: the small talk, the ranch addiction, the judgmental niceness—the just-a-little-too-cute phraseology (“Ope! Just gonna scooch by ya’ there!”). So, a Midwest Burlesque celebrating all our little quirks sounds like a fine idea. This show, at Hairpin Arts Center (2810 N. Milwaukee Ave.), promises a blowout honoring all your favorite endearing Midwesternisms, with interactive games, a raffle “and plenty of ranch.” You had me at Ope!
Saturday, Sept. 7: Book Sale @ Logan Square Library, 1 p.m.– 4:30 p.m.
If you’re reading this, congratulations —you’re literate! That’s really the first step in becoming a supporter of your local library. Take the next step by putting a few of your dollars toward the Logan Square Library branch’s (3030 W. Fullerton Ave.) operation and purchase a few books at their sale. You can then go home and use your previously ascertained literacy to find out what those books say. It’s really a win-win-win.
Monday, Sept. 9: Tarot Meet-Up @ Cafe Mustache, 6 p.m.– 8 p.m.
Your future holds a night of exploring these mystical cards, as a beginner or an expert or anything in between. The monthly meet-up welcomes skepticism, “the dumb questions you wanted to ask,” a new spread to try out or whatever you want out of the night. This gathering of the occult recurs every second Monday at Cafe Mustache (2313 N. Milwaukee Ave).
Friday, Sept. 13: Jurassic Park Pinball Release @ Logan Arcade: 7 p.m.-11 p.m.
What’s that? That’s an impact tremor, is what that is. Be fairly alarmed, because Stern Pinball’s newest release, “Jurassic Park,” is stomping into Logan Arcade (2410 W. Fullerton Ave.) on the hunt for human flesh—in the form of twitchy fingers ready to flap some flippers. Logan’s special event will feature drink specials and multiple Jurassic machines, for both tournament and casual play. You better all be holding onto your butts.
Saturday, Sept. 14: Beats for Boobs Fundraiser @ The Native, 2 p.m.– 6 p.m.
Bright Pink aims to improve the detection and early prevention of breast and ovarian cancer in young woman, and The Native (2417 N. Milwaukee Ave.) wants to help you support that mission. And you can do so in the funnest way possible, by dancing up a storm in your pinkest outfit. To help raise funds, the event will also feature an auction of items from local breweries and businesses, and The Native will send Bright Pink 50 percent of proceeds from all Partida Tequila Cocktails and Chicago Handshakes—because nothing makes Malort vaguely tolerable like the knowledge that you’re doing some good.
Saturday, Sept. 14: Lincoln Collection Sale for Immigrants @ Cole’s Bar, 9 p.m.– 2:30 a.m.
The first Republican president might have something to say about the conduct of the folks leading the party today. And the Great Emancipator’s image, long a beloved part of the decor at Cole’s Bar (2338 N. Milwaukee Ave.), will help beat back some of the worst effects of that leadership. Cole’s owner, Coleman Brice, has been collecting Abe Lincoln items since the bar opened, in 2009, and now plans to sell them off to raise funds for immigrants. All proceeds from this sale will go to the Logan Square Neighborhood Association’s immigrant rights team. Three bands will also perform, sponsored by PBR.
Sunday, Sept. 15: The Chick and the Pea @ Logan Farmers Market, 10 a.m.– 3 p.m.
Part of holding on to summer as long as you can is keeping up with Sundays at the Farmers Market (3107 W. Logan Blvd.) until that last, delicious summer tomato makes way for some weird-shaped gourd. This week’s edition features homemade hummus from The Chick and the Pea. Proprietor Diana started mashing her own chickpeas in 2012 and promises healthy recipes with minimal ingredients. Grab a dish, maybe pair it with some tomatoes, and pretend you’re in the Mediterranean, where summer never ends.
Wednesday, Sept. 18: LoganSquarist Neighbor Meetup @ Cole’s Bar, 7 p.m. – 9 p.m.
Every month, LoganSquarist brings the neighborhood together to connect and appreciate one of the area’s great venues with our Neighbor Meetups. This time, we’ll be amid the newly Lincoln-less walls of Cole’s (2338 N Milwaukee Ave), enjoying the beloved dive’s charms and a special of Old Style tallboys and a whiskey shot for a, you guessed it, Lincoln (that’s $5, folks). Cole’s open-mic comedy night follows the event, so you can laugh while consolidating all of the business cards you collected through the night.
Saturday, Sept. 21: Sucklord in Chicago @ Galerie F, 2:30 p.m. – 11:59 p.m.
New York pop artist and self-described “Chinatown supervillain” will weirden up Galerie F (2415 N. Milwaukee Ave.) with a mix of “bootleg toys, hip-hop and refined conversation.” Experience a “Suckadelic” lecture at 2:30, wherein you’ll learn the Sucklord’s philosophy of “art activation” and “self-actualization.” At 5 p.m., witness an old-school action-figure release, and stay for the mixtape release and after-party at 8 p.m.
Sunday, Sept. 22: Sane Abandoned band @ Crown, 8 p.m. – 11 p.m.
Start out the last (full) week of the month with some relaxing jams at Crown Liquor’s (2821 N. Milwaukee Ave.) free show. Sane Ideas describes itself as an alternative rock group that mixes pop and rock grooves. Supporting them are Kitchen Experiment, who boast influence from The Descendants, and Rich Salamander, who offers modern “commercialized” folk.
Sunday, Sept. 22: End-of-Summer Plant Shop Pop-Up @ Heavy Feather, 8 p.m – 11 p.m.
Heavy Feather (2357 N Milwaukee Ave, above Slippery Slope) marks the last day of summer with a burst of greenery. Yes, get your apartment all floralized before fall claims the leaves outside. Plant Shop Chicago will be selling leafy things — and buying a drink for the first 25 customers to nab a plant. Drinks include specialty cocktails from Ketel One’s Botanical Line.
Wednesday, Sept. 25: “I Can. I Do” film premiere @ Logan Theatre, 6 p.m. – 10 p.m.
The W|W international water organization welcomes audiences to the world premiere of its new film about the impact of water on people’s health and lives. “I Can. I Do” makes its debut at our very own Logan Theatre (2646 N Milwaukee Ave). What was meant to be a straightforward documentary ended up being inspirational and surprising, the organization says. The event includes a program presented by W|W and a wine reception following the movie.
Friday, Sept. 27 – Saturday, Sept. 28: Revolution Oktoberfest @ Revolution Brewpub, 3 p.m. – 10 p.m.
Revolution’s Oktoberfest shindig returns to Milwaukee Avenue — pay no attention to the address on that Facebook event page; it’s at the Logan spot (2323 N Milwaukee Ave), not the Avondale brewery. The festival runs 3 p.m. to 10 p.m. on Friday and 12 p.m. to 10 p.m. on Saturday, opening with the “ceremonial tapping of the first keg of Oktoberfest” at 3 on Friday. Check out some hard-driving tunes on “Metal Friday” and a more eclectic Saturday lineup. But as this is Revolution — and Oktoberfest! — the emphasis is on the beers, with Oktoberfest featured, alongside Fist City, Rev Pils and the Freedom of Press session sour.
Featured photo: Longman & Eagle, by Clayton Hauck